I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
