Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
