just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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