After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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