dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
you will always have a special place in my vag
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
