She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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