this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
