I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
wow bdsm is so cute
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize