i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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