My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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