after a month anything with tits is on the radar
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Randomize
