sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
