i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
