What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
