Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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