i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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