the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
