Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
