i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
