dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
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