We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Randomize
