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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.

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• (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.

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• (512): View more from Texas

  I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass

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• (408): View more from California

  Your text makes more sense read in reverse.

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• (801): View more from Utah

  Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown

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• (805): View more from California

  We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.

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• (808): View more from Hawaii

  WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."

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• (212): View more from New York

  I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?

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