garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
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