when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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