the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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