This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Randomize
