Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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