Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
