Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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