Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
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