PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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