Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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