Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
