i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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