Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
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