operation harelip BJ is a go
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Randomize