We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
