She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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