drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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