This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Randomize
