I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
