glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
He is an equal opportunity slut.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Did I show you my penis last night?
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize