where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
