Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
