well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
