I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
