Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize