Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
