All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize