no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
